Men, want to know why women cheat? 5 reasons for female infidelity are here! Take note so as not to be left with horns!
Indeed, since ancient times, a woman has been the keeper of the hearth.
She chose a suitable male for herself, after which she produced offspring from him and remained faithful until the end of her life.
But men, on the contrary, tried to inseminate as many women as possible and leave a large offspring.
AT modern world, it would seem that a woman does not need to fill her head with all sorts of nonsense about infidelity. However, as practice shows, women can also be polygamous, and their betrayals are sometimes so elegant that they make you admire.
But if everything is clear with men, then why do women cheat?
What or who pushes them into the arms of other men?
Looking ahead, I’ll say that you, dear men, are to blame for our betrayals, first of all!
And if you suddenly find yourself with horns, then only you and no one else are to blame for their appearance.
Do you want to argue? Let's!
I think in one of the examples you will definitely see yourself and understand the motives of betrayal.
So let's go!
Initially, I want to highlight some of the most important reasons that push us women to cheat:
- Indifference
- Ordinary
- Problems in marriage
- Dissatisfaction
- Groundless jealousy
As you can see, a woman has only five reasons for cheating.
I did not take into account nymphomania, since this problem lies much deeper and is more connected with the physical characteristics of a woman ...
Why do women change the rabies of the uterus or the guilt of the man?
Reason #1. Women change from the indifference of men
When thinking about why women cheat, it is worth looking at how men behave.
Having won the favor of the chosen one, the man loses interest in her and begins to use her as a housekeeper.
As a result, she washes, cooks, cleans, and the man only uses it.
He lays his ass on the couch and demands a delicious dinner from his chosen one and satisfy him intimately before going to bed.
Remember, dear men, we love with our ears, but you forget about it.
Without words and affection, without cute presents made for no reason, we begin to think that you have stopped loving us and go looking for someone who will appreciate our affection and care ...
Harsh but true!
Well, look at yourself ... For a nailed locker door or for a repaired shower, you demand words of gratitude, dinner and payment in kind.
Why, then, do you accept our work in the order of things and do not consider it necessary to give at least a shabby flower for 50 rubles?
We would be very pleased with such a gesture.
And we would know that you are not indifferent.
Reason number 2. Routine is an important reason why women cheat
At the beginning of a relationship, men are usually ready to go all out to get a woman's attention. They sing serenades under the window.Come at 12 at night with a bouquet of flowers.
They offer to rush just like that out of town, jump off a bungee or try to have sex in a crowded place.
Over time, this passion fades.
You no longer do romantic things, stop making gifts, and even prefer to have sex under the covers in 5 minutes.
Women, in turn, want to experience their former passion again, want to be carried in their arms, walk under the moon, etc.
As a result, they begin to change, only to feel their former passion again!
Reason number 3. Why women cheat or marriage problems
Constant quarrels and misunderstandings can also cause cheating women.
After the wedding, many men stop appreciating the woman next to him.
They bully, insult and even use physical force.
Tell me, do we really have to endure such goats next to us?
Yes, of course, divorce can be scary, so first women begin to cheat, and only then they leave their tyrant husband.
Now tell me, do you really marry a woman just to beat her and humiliate her?
To look like a male against her background?
Believe me, from the outside you look pathetic and disgusting ... and the women themselves are fools, since they endure such an abomination next to them!
Women, where is your self-respect?
P.S. write to me in the comments under this article (your opinion or personal observations), why are women afraid to leave such tyrant husbands?
Let's break it all down together.
Reason number 4. Dissatisfaction
AT this case I want to touch on a sexual topic.
It is believed that sex is more important for men than for women.
Actually it is not.
Women also love him very much, and sometimes even more than men!
Yes, yes - it is, we just talk about it less! 🙂
Very often in the modern world it happens that a woman must satisfy the sexual needs of a man here and now, and the needs of a woman can wait.
Some men even believe that a normal woman does not even have the right to even think about her own satisfaction and all her efforts should be directed only to the satisfaction of a man.
Don't you think it's selfish?
As a result, women go to the side of such a man who will think about them and give pleasure.
By the way, it was for this reason that one of my girlfriends began to cheat on her husband.
Her chosen one believed that a friend simply could not voluntarily want intimacy, therefore, ignored all her hints and pestering.
As a result, you can sincerely congratulate her husband and send a huge hello, as he has horns: branched and bushy!
Reason number 5. Groundless jealousy or why women cheat
I will say right away that baseless jealousy is a disease that cannot be cured.
And if you can't understand why do women cheat which means you will never understand.
And for women, advice - run away from such men while you are safe!
There are such pathological jealous people who are jealous of their beloved for every pillar.
I was late for 5 minutes, going home from work - it means I cheated!
I decided to walk 2 stops on foot because of the kilometer traffic jam - I had a lover!
If you don’t want to run after me barefoot in the cold, there’s probably already a lover in the closet!
Such claims are pleasant only in the first weeks after meeting.
Then such jealousy begins to infuriate and annoy.
And after a couple of months of constant reproaches and insults, a woman, in order to justify herself, actually goes to change!
Let me give you an example of my best friend.
Having lived without a boyfriend for a long time, one day she met a pathological jealous man.
At first she felt herself happy woman in the world.
The man was jealous of her, she was pleased.
She talked about his calls and late arrivals in one breath.
However, after two months of such a relationship, rose-colored glasses fell from my friend's eyes and other stories began.
He called her at work every half hour.
And when she worked with clients and threw off calls, he was terribly angry.
When she picked up the phone for 3 seconds to say that she had a client, he was angry again, thinking that her friend was taking lovers in turn. He called her at exactly 19:00 to check if she came home from work or not.
Otherwise, he arranged grandiose scandals.
He even forbade her to go to her mother, believing that she would cheat on him on the bus.
But the last straw of their relationship was her trip on a business trip.
He gave her an ultimatum: him or the job. She chose a job.
Arriving from a trip, she thought that the guy would leave her behind, but no. With a vengeance, he began to eat away at her brain, calling her a slut and a traitor.
As a result, a friend actually began to cheat and eventually married the guy with whom she cheated (and don’t forget - the thought is material, and ex-boyfriend I did it myself!)
Their marriage is over five years old and my girlfriend is really happy!
Now check out this helpful video.
(this applies primarily to men)
where most of the reasons are revealed female infidelity!
P.S. Personally, I agree 100% with all the reasons given...
Summing up, I would like to advise you, dear men, to be more attentive to your chosen ones!
After all, not respecting your wife or girlfriend, you may not even notice her betrayal, but come to your senses only when your beloved slams the door in your nose and you are left with nothing.
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Women's infidelity, as a rule, is due to dissatisfaction with marriage. A woman may not receive attention from her husband, expressions of love, proper support and help in household chores. In this case, she begins to look for a man's shoulder on the side.
Psychologists agree that a woman outside of marriage, as a rule, is looking not for sex, but for emotional support and protection, since she feels lonely with her husband.
Read also: five needs in marriage, the satisfaction of which reduces the possibility of female infidelity - Cheating and 5 needs in marriage. - Ed.Extramarital sex is often a strong emotional connection that she is driven to by serious psychological reasons. Going on a betrayal, a woman, as a rule, thinks about it for a long time, and then painfully worries about her.
Why does a woman cheat on her husband?
8 common causes of female infidelity:
1. The desire to feel loved again and increase self-esteem.
2. Desire to feel novelty and satisfy curiosity.
3. For career purposes.
A similar reason most often happens with women who are subordinate to a male boss. In some cases, treason may take on the character of explicit coercion.
4. Revenge on her husband for infidelity or humiliation.
5. The desire to prolong youth and experience strong feelings.
6. The desire to satisfy the aggravated sexual need, or to feel their power over a man.
7. The desire to thank for the help, support and kind attitude in difficult times.
8. Option to make money.
AT modern society quite a lot of women (and men) are ready to enter into a casual relationship with a wealthy person in order to receive gifts or money. As a rule, the family does not know anything about this woman's life.
Despite the fact that most women cheat in order to find love on the side, there is a category of women who are disposed to cheating.
A predisposition to extramarital affairs can develop due to several reasons:
- in the family of a woman, the mother cheated on her father, or the sister or close friend has a lover;
- does not love her husband much and is the head of the family;
- considers treason justified;
- has rich sexual experience and is more educated than her husband;
- dreams of a romantic connection and has a longtime contender for this role;
- is at a critical age or is experiencing a period of life failures;
- separated from her husband;
- strives for independence and autonomy.
Unlike cheating men, women usually have one lover. More often, women do not find themselves, and do not refuse when a man finds them. A woman strives to be faithful to her new chosen one, and even her husband ceases to exist for her as a sexual partner.
Very often, being in an extramarital relationship, a woman worries a lot and doubts about her betrayal. She thinks about how everything will end, and why it is necessary, if everything in life remains unchanged.
Male betrayal today will not surprise anyone. Moreover, in society there is no sharp condemnation of men for their campaigns on the side. The explanation of their polygamous physiology is most often limited to one phrase “He's a man!”, Which implies permission for treason. And, despite the fact that the betrayal of a husband is one of the most common causes of divorce in the world, most often men's fleeting hobbies are forgiven by their wives.
The attitude in society towards female adultery is the opposite. Since ancient times, a woman was considered a coaster, a keeper of the hearth. Her modesty, fidelity to her husband were considered the most valuable qualities. In some cultures, a wife could be executed for treason, more often a crowd threw stones at a traitor. Today, a woman who cheated on her husband does not expect such a severe punishment. But, if a man's infidelity is justified by nature itself, then female adultery is a complex concept that requires a detailed explanation.
The psychology of female infidelity
The nature of female infidelity can be explained by one phrase from an old anecdote: "It is not difficult to take someone else's wife away, it is difficult to return her back later." Although many wives deny that they can ever cheat on their spouse, in fact, statistics prove the opposite. A woman, unlike a man, is guided not by the physiological needs given to him by nature, but by feelings. Therefore, it is a married woman who is easiest to seduce and fall in love with herself. Against the backdrop of a stagnant relationship with a spouse and a lack of romance, it is very easy to awaken a woman's extinguished feelings. After all, every woman dreams of being loved and desired, and words for her are often more important than actions. Think about why at all times notorious romantics and vagabonds were revered by women more than sensible businessmen? Why do women leave a reliable spouse for a street bully? As already mentioned, women live with feelings, and cheating for them is an action dictated by their emotional sphere. No woman will cheat on her husband just because she liked the biceps or butt of her alleged lover. Among the causes of female infidelity lie deeper roots.
Common causes of female infidelity
So, why does the wife decide to take such a risky step? For many, this is, first of all, a step of desperation, a search for a way out of a situation, a solution to problems. The reasons for the wife's infidelity should be sought only in the family.
- Trying to forget family problems. More than 10 years of marriage pass, the family has children, but there are certain problems that do not make a woman happy in marriage. Young girls are more likely to file for divorce, and a woman with decades family life, will not dare to destroy the created world. Because of my own insecurities, because of my children, because of the fear of change. She will find an outlet in the form of a lover. But over time, this illusion will also be destroyed, a woman will realize that she is deceiving herself, first of all.
- Satisfying your own ego. Psychologists say that an unmarried woman can be distinguished by her look, by a certain gleam in her eyes, an aura emanating from her. Having married, a woman loses these signs and becomes uninteresting for men. And the fact that she is married also repels fans from her. It is in search of male attention and romance that a woman decides to cheat. Moreover, often in such cases, it is she who becomes the initiator of extramarital relations.
- Problems in sexual life. Intimacy plays a big role in family life. But over time, passion dulls, and many couples are overtaken by a crisis. Not trying to find a joint solution to this problem, the spouses find it on the side. Sexual dissatisfaction pushes for treason and wife.
- Women's revenge. Cheating for this reason is a huge mistake. Having learned about her husband's infidelity, the wife, overwhelmed by feelings, under the influence of severe stress, goes for treason. But the result is a spiritual emptiness and, perhaps, even a broken marriage. After all, a man, unlike a woman, is not always ready to forgive betrayal.
- New love. No matter how old a woman is, she constantly needs love and romantic courtship. And, if on her way she meets a seducer who will give her everything, then she, headlong, will rush into the maelstrom of new relationships.
- Frequent separations. Long business trips of the spouse can also serve as a catalyst for the wife's infidelity. In this case, there are a number of reasons that contribute to discord in relationships: lack of attention, suspicion of the husband of infidelity, sexual dissatisfaction.
- The first love. As you know, first love leaves the strongest emotional memories in the soul. And if the object of youthful passion (provided that he did not drink too much, did not degrade) meets on the path of a woman, then her memory will excite past memories and the relationship will continue.
- Marriage without love. Unfortunately, such marriages are becoming frequent in society. A childhood friend, by calculation, by flight - it is difficult to surprise with such reasons for getting married.
And another important aspect - a woman cheats not only with her body, but also with her soul. Therefore, if a break with a mistress is easy for a man, then for a woman such a choice is very difficult. And when such a situation occurs, it is very important to stop being guided by feelings, and start acting according to the arguments of the mind.
Signs of a cheating wife
The nature of a woman is such that it is difficult for her to hide the changes that are happening to her. The female powerful emotional sphere is again to blame for everything. Therefore, if the wife did not admit to infidelity herself, which often happens, her husband can find out about her romance by a number of signs:
- the wife hides her phone from her husband, does not talk on the phone with him;
- there have been changes in appearance, the wife began to carefully monitor herself;
- a woman has cooled off for sex, constantly finds a reason to evade intimacy;
- the spouse has become emotionally distant;
- she no longer cares about housekeeping;
- absences from home became frequent, the wife also returns late from work;
- any words or actions of the spouse now irritate the woman;
- and the most important sign of infidelity is the appearance of brilliance in the eyes, mystery and riddles.
But no matter what reasons a woman is guided by infidelity, its consequences are, most often, very sad. What does a woman feel after her infidelity?
Most likely, an exorbitant burden of guilt will fall on women's shoulders. Even if the husband never learns about the fact of the committed betrayal, the wife will worry and suffer for a very long time because of what she has done. Because of the fear of condemnation and disclosure of secrets, a woman is unlikely to tell anyone about her act. But in such situations, it is best to speak out, cry on someone's shoulder. Being in this case herself and a lawyer, and a judge, and an executioner, a woman can easily reach a nervous breakdown. And then only a psychologist or a husband who forgave her can help.
The breakup of a family can also be a sad consequence of a wife's infidelity. Although, depending on which side to look at. If the marriage was already bursting at the seams, maybe it's not worth saving? And divorce is the only step to start life from a new leaf. As a rule, men do not forgive adultery. A man understands perfectly well that if his wife cheated on him, then she gave vent to feelings, which means that not only physical, but also spiritual betrayal occurred. This means that his wife does not belong to him. And rarely can a spouse forgive this. Therefore, the consequences of a wife's infidelity for her husband are always so categorical.
Another consequence of the completed adultery is a new relationship and, possibly, a new family. There are many such cases in life. Having met true love, the woman goes to her lover and gets married. In this case, we can say that life after the betrayal has become happier.
Thus, we can conclude that the reasons for adultery on the part of the wife lie in the search for love, warmth, attention and understanding, which she lacks in the family. Change occurs when the relationship has outlived its usefulness. Therefore, in order not to blame yourself for the destruction of the family, you need to do everything to save it before a woman decides to take a desperate step. If in her own husband she sees at the same time a protector, lover, friend, then there will not even be thoughts of betrayal.
And crises.
Cheating in a couple is quite common, especially if the partners are immature, do not feel relationship responsibility.
Going to the side is an indicator of how devoted the partners are to each other.
Knowing the reasons why do women cheat, will allow men to adjust communication in such a way as to reduce the likelihood of betrayal and disappointment to a minimum.
Are all ladies capable of treason?
Perhaps you wondered if all women are capable of committing treason?
Some men will answer yes to the question, based on my own experience of failed relationships.
Those who trust their girlfriend will say that there are ladies who are not capable of betrayal.
A situation arises for any person from time to time when treason is potentially possible. However, the majority stops internal censors, rules and regulations.
Devotion to a partner is brought up initially by the example of parents and close friends. The model of the family, which the girl saw and learned in childhood, has an influence.
Potentially, any person is capable of treason, but he is stopped by love for a partner, respect, a sense of guilt that will arise after. In a strong family where everyone trusts each other, cares, pays attention cheating is much less common.
Thus, one cannot say that everyone changes and everyone is capable of betrayal. A properly educated person who has respect for a partner will try to avoid betrayal, as this is contrary to moral principles.
What women are capable of treason? Scientists' opinion:
Psychology and causes
Why and why do women and girls cheat? Let's look at the reasons why girls and women can commit adultery.
Evolutionarily, the woman subconsciously looking for a better father for your child.
She chooses a stronger, more active male. With a weak man, the likelihood of cheating increases, since he does not meet the main selection criteria.
However, this finding the strongest male becomes a problem. A girl can easily fall in love if a man shows qualities that seem suitable and ideal for her. The choice often occurs at an unconscious level.
Wrong upbringing, the search for an ideal become the reasons that the girl begins to change partners often.
At the same time, she may have a permanent chosen one or even a husband, but for some reason he does not meet her needs. Or it is a habit - to take as much as possible, to diversify your life.
When does a woman want to change? Find out from the video:
Consequences of female infidelity
Any action is effects.
When a woman commits adultery, she must be aware of them, although in reality this is not always the case.
What threatens female infidelity:
- family destruction. Even a single betrayal leads to the fact that the relationship will no longer be the same. Husband, partner will forever remember the betrayal. Children suffer too;
- guilt that the girl will feel. This usually applies to those women in whom infidelity occurs for the first time;
- loss of husband's trust. Even if a person forgives, somewhere in the depths of the soul there will be doubt;
- the chance of getting pregnant from a lover. Unfortunately, the statistics are disappointing - almost a third of children are born not from their husbands;
- chance of catching diseases sexually transmitted. Fidelity is directly related to the health of the couple.
Domestic crimes are recorded every day. Some of them occurred on the basis of jealousy and are the result of the betrayal of one of the partners.
Why do women cheat? 5 real reasons:
Psychologist's opinion
Why do wives cheat but don't leave their husbands?
Not all women after infidelity decide to leave the family.
There are situations when a lady for many years communicates with a lover and her husband is unaware of it.
The reasons are different:
A family - it is convenient, it is a certain level of stability, security, including financial. A woman seeks to be protected, to have support.
The husband is part of life, providing some stability. In addition, he is familiar, understandable, his actions are predictable.
Being married is convenient, prestigious from the point of view of society. That is why, even when deciding to betray, a woman prefers to stay with her husband, as a guarantor of her stability and security.
Why can't you forgive?
What to do if you are sure that a woman is cheating? Unfortunately, some husbands are just. But this leaves an imprint on the psyche of the man himself. He can become depressed, become aggressive, obsessive negative thoughts, neuroses will appear.
The problem with betrayal must be solved, and not tolerated, thereby reducing one's own self-esteem, self-esteem.
Forgive and forget treason, as a rule, weak men, with, low social status or those who are satisfied with life with his woman.
In many ways, emotional dependence on a partner, fear of losing him influences.
Eventually the personality of a man is deformed. Another option is that he himself calmly goes to betrayal, and the family is simply a duty for both spouses. He prefers to forgive, even at the cost of his own self-respect.
Statistics show that a person who cheated once is able to betray again. This is a property of the human psyche - barriers have been removed, and nothing else prevents repeating the misconduct.
In addition, a woman is able to turn the situation around in such a way that the man himself will feel guilty for he pushed her to the wrong. This form of manipulation cannot be forgiven.
Why can't you forgive women's infidelity? Answer in this video:
What if she walks to the left?
You suspect a girl of treason, or maybe she does it openly. What to do in this case?
Change is not allowed. A family is two people devoted to each other. If there is betrayal, then there are problems. Separate, forgive, live together - everyone decides for himself.
What to do if a girl cheats? Practical recommendations:
Female adultery hurts not only the husband, but also the children. Often, the betraying lady also suffers terribly. Children remain psychologically traumatized, a man loses self-respect, his wife feels like a traitor. Then comes the divorce. At least it seems so. But everything is more complicated, not always so tragic. So what are the reasons for female adultery, how does it differ from male adultery, and what consequences does it lead to. And most importantly, how to avoid infidelity.
Psychological reasons gender changes are very different. A man is simply looking for a way to satisfy the "basic instinct". But for the representative of the weaker sex, an emotional emotional connection is important. This is clearly evidenced by the results of a study conducted several years ago in Russia, the countries of Eastern Europe. Only about a quarter of cheating women said they did not have deep feelings for their lover. As many as 70% of men said the same.
The psychology of female infidelity is not simple. Ladies Infidelity When They Have big problems with the faithful. Then the fair sex try to find a new lover. Moreover, a woman, in order to decide to leave her husband, is not enough just a feeling of spiritual intimacy, good sex. Ladies want stability, security. Therefore, a lover should show a willingness to live the rest of his life with a woman.
But the missus is quite satisfied with cheating husbands. Representatives of the stronger sex are simply looking for a way to diversify their sex life, take a break from family life. Men want connections without obligation. Unfaithful husbands have no desire to divorce. When choosing a mistress, the representatives of the stronger sex are not selective. She is seen not as a person, but as a female object to satisfy the basic instinct. Only external data has value (and not necessarily). These are the features
Husbands usually hide adultery, trying to behave with the second half as usual. Women have a harder time doing this. It is not easy for females to play the role of a loving wife, they often confess, regret what happened.
Why is female adultery for her husband very painful?
The ego of the strong half of humanity is more vulnerable, a man is harder to take blows to his pride. It is very difficult to experience the betrayal of the second half. The revealed truth deprives self-respect. A man begins to consider himself a loser, a weakling, a “loser” to his lover. Severe depression develops, various neurotic disorders. He does not bother with the psychology of betrayal.
Husband is hurt primarily by the fact of dishonesty of a woman. Constant lies destroy confidence in the weaker sex, instill pathological jealousy. When a devoted man gets divorced, looking for a new couple, it is difficult for him to rebuild a healthy relationship.
Why women cheat on their husbands: common reasons, psychology
Women are filled with sexual energy no less than the male half of humanity. Ladies also fall in love, they are dissatisfied with marriage, they want changes. But society still considers adultery committed by the weaker sex to be a much greater "crime" for male infidelity. It looks through its fingers at the betrayal of a spouse. A woman is called a debauchee, a criminal who betrayed her family. Naturally, everything is much more complicated. - a well without a bottom.
There are a lot of reasons why a wife decides to change. Here are the main ones.
Low self-esteem, other psychological problems
People who suffer from low self-esteem often decide to change. Depression, psychological trauma, from childhood (for example, a girl became a victim of a pedophile), cause a desire to raise low self-esteem with the help of infidelity.
Such a connection temporarily relieves the painful feeling of uselessness, inner emptiness, helps to forget about psychological problems, to feel (if not for long) oneself desired, loved, “alive, real”.
Finding Inner Stability Through Sexual Relationships
If a girl was sexually abused as a child, the resulting trauma often manifests itself as sexual addiction (nymphomania). The problem can also appear in people suffering from manic-depressive psychosis ( bipolar disorder), borderline personality disorder. Such women are constantly looking for emotional, spiritual intimacy. With the help of numerous betrayals, such individuals are temporarily freed from, feel "real", acquire a sense of significance. Women who have suffered from sexual violence, through sexual intercourse, return the feeling of inner security that disappeared after sexual violence. They are alien to remorse, recognizing their adultery as a psychological betrayal.
Lack of emotional soul connection
Due to employment, the spouse cools down by the second half, spends little time with his beloved, rarely talks, hugs and kisses not often enough. And the woman in her lover is trying to find a person who will give the missing warmth and care. Cheating, from the point of view of psychology, is the desire to feel truly loved.
By the way! The importance of a spiritual connection for the weaker sex is evidenced by an interesting experiment conducted several decades ago by American scientists. Persons of both sexes of traditional orientation were shown 2 videos where couples of gays and lesbians beautifully looked after each other, then indulged in lovemaking. About 80% of men were excited only by a video with two ladies. But for as many as 70% of women, both videos evoked an emotional response.
In the plot with two lesbians, the ladies saw not only love pleasures but also an emotional connection. Therefore, the video did not leave them indifferent. Men in the relationship of two gay men saw only the sexual aspect, which is disgusting.
By the way, therefore, the scripts for erotic films intended for a male audience are simplified as much as possible. Everything there is reduced to endless intercourse. The same applies to literature of this kind. But erotic films intended for women (take, for example, the sensational "50 Shades of Grey") are always built on romance, the psychological, emotional aspect of relationships. Sexual acts play a secondary role.
Unrealistic expectations - naivety, narcissism
Way to end a relationship
It can be difficult for a woman to "directly" break off a relationship. She is afraid to tell her husband frankly: feelings have disappeared. So he takes a lover. The lady has no love for him. Communication on the side is just a reason for divorce.
These are the main explanations for why women cheat, whose psychology is more vulnerable and sensitive than men's.
Ways to avoid female infidelity
It is important for a man to remain the same attentive gentleman that he was when he met his future second half. It is necessary to make pleasant surprises, unexpectedly give tights, shoes, say that the beloved is the best, the most beautiful. The spouse should remember about romance, spend a lot of time with his beloved, emotionally support.
The husband needs to help his wife with the housework, actively participate in the upbringing of children. If the wife earns well, a man needs to rejoice in the success of the second half. The husband must hide that he is hurt by this state of affairs. On the occasion of a promotion, a spouse should organize a small holiday, congratulate, give gifts.
Naturally, we must not forget about. It is beneficial for a spouse to do everything so that a woman gets pleasure during sex. The wife must constantly feel that she is central to the life of her beloved. This will strengthen the marriage union, reduce the danger of adultery.
Remember! It is important for women to refrain from extremely ineffective, "negative" ways to prevent infidelity. The husband should not be jealous, threaten, try to control, try to find out where the missus is. This will only push to adultery.
If the couple lives in civil marriage, a man needs to be offered to get married as soon as possible. Any person of the weaker sex always makes plans, thinks about the future, longs for stable strong relationships. Absence wedding ring on the finger inspires anxiety. It seems to a woman: the day will come when she will be abandoned. The lady begins to think about plan B. If the beloved does not even want to hear about marriage, children, then the spouse can begin to implement plan B. That is why a man needs to make plans for the future together with his beloved. Then, psychologists say, treason does not threaten.
Ways to find out if a woman is cheating
It's hard for a woman to hide own feelings. Most often, a lady confesses everything or gives herself away. The cheating spouse sits at the mirror for a long time, again begins to go to aerobics, fitness, constantly tries to look good. Not only in your own eyes, but also in the eyes of your lover.
Also, an unfaithful woman begins to find fault with things that she used to endure (dishes unwashed by her husband, scattered clothes). Or vice versa: completely stops paying attention to the shortcomings of the spouse, as if the faithful are not at all interested. A cheating wife becomes emotionally, sexually cold. Avoids all physical contact (even simple hugs).
When a spouse is sure that the wife is cheating or the missus has confessed to everything, it is very important to decide what to do next. Together they should talk honestly about the future. Of course, a couple who finds themselves in such a difficult situation needs specialists to help decide whether it is worth maintaining a relationship, or love has completely faded away, and therefore it is better to get a divorce calmly without unnecessary dramas, scandals.
Consequences of female infidelity
Women's infidelity much more often than men's ends in divorce. It can be difficult for a lady to stop cheating, even when she wants to. Emotionally, she is already "split", the lover has become a close person with whom a woman connects her own future.
Naturally, cheating affects children. Teenage daughters may develop hostile feelings towards their father, placing the blame for what happened on his shoulders. Sons, on the other hand, will tend to blame their mother. This will negatively affect the psyche. Marital relations in children will begin to be associated with deceit and suffering. It will not be easy to build normal relationships with the opposite sex.
Ways to overcome the consequences of infidelity if the marriage was saved
If the marriage can be saved, the woman returns to the faithful, the couple needs serious psychological help. After all, guilt can lead to severe depression. With the help of proven psychotherapeutic techniques, psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valerievich Baturin will help his wife overcome remorse for what he has done, and restore self-respect to a man.
In order for deep wounds from infidelity to heal, the wife should be as frank as possible. At a therapy session or alone with her husband, a woman should honestly admit everything, ask for forgiveness. It is very important that the lady explain the motives of her actions, tell how long the betrayal lasted. Then gradually the husband will again begin to trust the second half.
Psychologists advise the reconciled couple to conduct a symbolic ritual of farewell to the past. At some memorable place (for example, next to the wedding palace or the temple where the couple got married), they need to burn a piece of paper with the inscription "treason", then re-swear an oath of allegiance to each other. This will definitely be remembered, will bring back good memories. Also, the couple needs to organize a “remake” of the honeymoon, go on a honeymoon trip again to forget the past, start a clean slate relationship.
What caused female adultery through the eyes of a psychologist? Ways of self-justification
Psychologists say that cheating leads to cognitive dissonance - a discord between values and actions. That is why the cheating spouse needs to justify the betrayal. This situation resembles a war, when a soldier is forced to kill, although his values do not allow him to do so. The soldier needs to temporarily change own principles, find a good excuse for murders. Or, in the language of psychology, to rationalize their own actions. The role of "innovator" is played by patriotic propaganda.
Methods of self-justification:
- The faithful woman is not worthy. Of course, an extramarital affair is not murder, but it also causes a discord between the values and actions of a person. The changing personality often rationalizes the betrayal, instilling in itself the idea that the other half deserves it. The discord between values and actions is weakening, the woman is no longer tormented by doubts. She, with a clear conscience, begins to look for a new partner.
- Double life. Also, some people suppress guilt with the help of separate thinking. A woman divides her personal life into two parts. The first is reserved for the husband, the second - for the lover. A woman ceases to be aware of the inconsistency of her own behavior, begins to lead a double life, trying to remain a good wife for her husband and be a desired mistress for another. Women rarely choose this way of rationalizing their feelings of guilt. It is much more characteristic of the male sex.
- The woman thinks she is "bad". Some people, in order to get rid of cognitive dissonance, inspire themselves that they simply cannot be faithful wives. To reduce the feeling of guilt, ladies begin to think that they have an immature character, they cannot control their own behavior. “Here, it would be,” such representatives of the weaker sex say to themselves, “it would be better, it would remain true. But my terrible character, and bad heredity do not give. There is no one to blame for the betrayal."
Blaming a lady for such "immoral thoughts" is really pointless. A person who goes on a betrayal longs for his values and actions to coincide, otherwise a feeling of dissatisfaction with himself, a feeling of guilt, and despair will inevitably be born. This mental state often ends in depression, even suicide attempts. Therefore, there is nothing strange that the human psyche does everything to get rid of the painful value dissonance born of betrayal.
The betrayal of a woman does not necessarily turn into the end of a relationship and a tragedy. Often this is a new beginning. If the wife leaves her lover, and the spouse is ready to forgive, then they will turn this difficult page of their lives and fall in love again. Get out of a difficult situation will help advice on