The key signs of a wife cheating on her husband are exposure! How does a man feel after his betrayal? My husband says he loves him and continues to cheat.

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I managed to move away and calm down after several dozen infidelities of my already unloved wife in nine months. It took another three months to somehow bring together all the methods of getting rid of emotions and feelings associated with betrayal.

There was trust between us

She didn’t nag me when I joked with female work colleagues and returned from fishing a day after the appointed time. So I didn’t get discouraged when her boss or just an acquaintance kissed her hand in my presence, didn’t forbid her to dress beautifully and sexy, allowed her to hang out in the company of her friends, among whom, it’s important to note, there were both girls and boys. All those guys they had been with since school.

Instead of engaging in mutual torment with jealousy and losing our minds at the slightest thought that someone could become the third in our couple, we were simply an ideal couple - we walked, watched movies, read, discussed books and all sorts of modern news. We talked and talked about the meaning of life and the essence of love. In short, everything that happened later simply killed me with its incredibleness, the wildness of the situation and terrible cynicism.

Honestly? I wanted to kill.

I could not even think about the fact that she had been cheating on me for two years and could not even imagine it in my worst fantasy. But a fact is a fact. I punched the first friend who expressed his timid “You know...”, and I broke off relations with the second. After the third person told me one clear fact, I began to think.

I made peace with the guys, said that I was furious with such statements, and asked them to tell me more. They agreed to forgive me - this is the advantage of male friendship.

What I learned next is beyond description. She cheated on me for two years, which for me were filled with love and the most sincere human relationships. The number of partners with whom she managed to hook up and break up is difficult to calculate. I know of 17 cases. It's strange that this didn't come up earlier, but the facts are reliable. My now ex-wife confirmed this to me - she simply said that she didn’t want me to know everything, she said that she loved me, she said that she felt good and comfortable in all respects. In every way, you know? And she didn’t say a word about the reasons for the betrayal.

And, to be honest, I wanted to kill - just to pay for the cynical act, first with her, then with most of her partners. And then go to jail. It seems to me that they would understand me there. True, I never decided to do this. Still, the main thing in life is a cool mind and sober calculation.

I just kicked her out. From the apartment, from the passport and from the finger of the right hand. Kicked out of my life. And then came the nights after the divorce, and I didn't know how to get through it all.

The main thing is trust

The first point is to erase the memory of life together. I cleared the apartment of everything we had acquired together that reminded us of her: I bought new dishes (to hell with those cute bowls with the inscriptions “He” and “She”), took down the pictures, changed the carpet she chose, repainted the bathroom. Great. Now - photos, videos and other scraps of memory. Photos together, cute pictures on the wall and, most importantly, correspondence. Don’t be afraid to click “Delete” and send several kilometers of tiny messages to the cesspool of the Internet.

Made. It seems that everything - now instead of love, which suddenly became hatred, there is an empty hole in the heart and head. This happens when after a holiday you can’t remember the last two days, but you realize that you did something wrong.

Meet with your best friend or at least your best buddy - talk about the situation, talk it out completely, open up and empty all the dirt and pain that has accumulated in your soul. It’s good if it’s a friend who knows you from kindergarten, school or the army. It’s better for women not to tell - in this case there are too many variables in the equation and no one knows what such a frank conversation will lead to.

The most important thing is not to drown your sadness in alcohol. Drinking that lasts more than one evening will not change anything at all, and a whole piece of the rest of a happy life with the traitor crossed out of it will remain in the memory of a hangover.

When I'm left alone

When I was left alone, I saw that almost all the ways to relax, have fun, or, conversely, engage in self-development, were invented for single men. Seriously - gyms, foreign language courses, stadiums, deep forests where you can calmly take a walk and think about your own thoughts. Even the camera viewfinder and books on financial literacy and male etiquette are all for singles. And I took advantage of this, deciding to become much better than I was. Obviously, I didn't forget about the breakup for a second, but it gave me a serious push to become a better person, to work on myself.

As a result, after six months, my already satisfactory salary doubled, my English allowed me to communicate with girls in Thailand so that we both understood where everything was going, and life acquired a clear schedule and a clear goal.

There will still be women

Just don’t worry, guys, if your girlfriend turns up “suddenly.” There is no need to deny love - that same woman will happen to you. It's like a train moving when you think you've already arrived at the depot, but, in fact, you just stopped at the stop. There will still be a destination with a warm hearth and truly loving eyes opposite. Just don’t raise your hand to a woman - it’s not worth it under any circumstances.

Do you suspect that your husband is cheating and deceiving? Don't rush to throw him a tantrum! If you can’t catch him red-handed, you first need to make sure of this and check everything with precision! We will tell you how to understand that a guy is walking “to the left”, what signs exist. You will also be able to collect evidence that will help bring him to clean water. In addition, you will learn what to do if he denies betrayal in every possible way, how a deceiver behaves, what he says, what kind of family relationships are like at this time, and much more.

The deceiver's behavior usually changes dramatically for no apparent reason.

Pay attention to:

the disappearance of habits that were previously an integral attribute of your partner;
other taste preferences - the mistress cooks and eats other food, so the unfaithful husband could get used to it and stop loving your lunches and dinners;
a sudden love for physical activity, if previously your partner in every possible way denied playing sports;
new appearance - a man begins to take care of his clothes, dramatically changes his style, spends much longer preening in front of the mirror in order to impress his mistress.

In order to find out whether he is cheating on you, you also need to analyze your relationship and what your husband says. He may either begin to treat you too kindly, cajole you with gifts (usually not too expensive, since all the money goes to his mistress), or avoid any contact with you, both spiritual and physical.

The common belief that a deceiver is much more likely to stay late at work and go on business trips is true. There are several reasons for this - either at this time he is having fun with his mistress, or he is really working, but in order to provide for her. Therefore, the family budget may suddenly become empty, and you will suddenly discover that your savings for a long-awaited trip abroad have disappeared somewhere.

If your husband is cheating on you, then you can find out by the fact that joint leisure will definitely disappear into oblivion. Your partner will no longer have enough time for this. He will spend all his free hours on another woman, because she also needs attention.

Intimate relationships are also gradually becoming a thing of the past. There are several reasons for this:

a man finds sex on the side - he is quite satisfied with his mistress, who is usually much younger;
Your appearance - sometimes women are so caught up in family life that they completely forget about the need to take care of themselves;
he constantly thinks about the other;
lost interest in you.

No faithful and loving man will refuse the sex that his wife offers him, unless he is truly sick. If there are constant excuses in the style of “my head hurts, I’m tired, it was a hard day at work,” then be sure to try to get to the bottom of the truth: he could easily have cheated.

Men never go “to the left” just like that, it’s told here. You will find out whether all guys are the same, what they themselves think about this, and how to prevent this from happening.

To prevent cheating, a girl needs to take care of herself. Here are good recipes. You can prepare nourishing, moisturizing and cleansing products.

For a husband to be faithful, it is necessary. In this article, we have compiled some tips for managing your home and maintaining good relationships. You should also learn. If you want to be worth your weight in gold, it wouldn’t hurt. We have already told you what you need to care for the skin of your hands, face, and body and how to use it all.

How can a wife verify that her husband has cheated?

If your husband suddenly becomes interested in going to the gym, then invite him to play sports together. Usually, after such a proposal, the partner suddenly begins to look for excuses, stammers, and cannot give a clear answer.

If you are afraid to ask directly, here are examples of similar phrases that will help induce feelings of guilt and recognize infidelity:

“You look so good today, I’m incredibly happy that you are my husband!”;
“It’s so good that no one else has a husband like me”;
“It’s rare to meet such a sensitive and faithful man like you”;
“You are so beautiful in every way, you have never had anyone but me.”

We recommend reading free book Alexey Chernozem "What to do with male infidelity." You will learn why men cheat and leave for their mistresses, how to react correctly to betrayal in order to preserve the relationship and prevent it from happening again in the future, and also how to survive all this.

The book is free. To download, click on this link, leave your e-mail and you will receive an email with a link to the pdf file.

If these phrases cause a man to stammer, blush, become irritated, or even become enraged, it is obvious that you have managed to catch the deceiver. An innocent person will simply laugh and hug his beloved.

Never create scandals if you suspect cheating, and especially if you were able to expose him. On the contrary, say something kind to your husband before leaving for work, compliment him on his impeccable appearance. This may make him feel guilty.

Another good way to identify infidelity is to tell a story about a fictitious friend who allegedly caught her husband with someone else. During the story, be sure to say a complimentary phrase about your spouse (“It’s good that I know that you would never do that,” or “Thank God that I don’t have such problems, and never will, because you and I love each other.” friend"). At the same moment, carefully observe his reaction, he will become ashamed, he will not be able to find words to maintain the conversation, because there is nothing to say.

What gestures will help you recognize a guy’s deception?

Knowledge will help you body language and male psychology. If your husband is once again late at work, kindly inquire about the project he is currently working on. At the same time, watch his gestures:

eyes - a running glance or a glance at the floor means fear of direct contact with you;
mouth - a restless, slight smile that appears and disappears, says that the person is deceiving and is embarrassed.
face - a person blushes and/or turns pale for no apparent reason, or speaks too calmly, with a stony face, as if he doesn’t care at all. This can only mean indifference to half or wine.
Gestures - excessive gesticulation, touching the nose, frequent adjustment of clothes shows that he is nervous.

To figure out betrayal, ask about the project several more times in a day or week, and you will notice that each time the information acquires new details, and some details change or disappear altogether, becoming completely opposite in meaning to those that were given to you earlier.

If you are sure of your suspicions, then do not delay and start the conversation first. Don't get hysterical, don't scream, be as calm and collected as possible. It is this behavior that will make the unfaithful spouse panic, who will instantly feel guilty.

The conversation begins with the fact that you feel cold in the relationship, you understand that a lot is going wrong. Only then talk about your suspicions about your mistress.

How to expose if a man denies everything

It may also happen that the partner will stubbornly deny his guilt. If you are still confident in your suspicions, then it is time to get final evidence. Be prepared for the fact that your spouse will hide all his devices, which contain the most important information. Therefore, you will have to seize the moment.

You can detect infidelity by looking at his mobile phone, where there may be contacts with suspicious names. Look through the SMS, she could write him tender words “I miss you”, “I love you”, etc. This option is not acceptable for everyone, because in this way you will humiliate yourself and show distrust to your partner.

If your husband says that Vladik again invited him to go fishing for the whole weekend, and also runs into another room to communicate with him in any free time, then sound the alarm.

Through mutual acquaintances, you can find out whether your spouse really goes fishing so often, and also whether there is a friend with that name. Take full advantage of being friends with the same people as your husband - they usually know much more than you and will tell you everything you need at the right time.

Exchange phone numbers with mutual friends, do not tell your partner that you are now communicating with them too. When he once again says that he is going to his friends, call them and in a friendly way ask them to make sure that your husband does not get too drunk. If they are surprised by your request (after all, no joint party was planned!), then this will be a reason to talk to your spouse again.

Evidence may include:

delays at work;
absence at night;
dropping your calls;
the women's perfume he smells of;
scratched back;
hickeys.

You can easily find out if he is cheating on you with the tips in this video. The psychologist talks about 5 main signs of infidelity.

Don't attack him before the evidence reaches you, as he may destroy all the "evidence". And remember that you don’t need to immediately forgive betrayal - someone who decided on it once can do it again, because a truly loving person will never go “to the left.” If necessary, seek psychological help.

All men are suspicious and jealous by nature. This is normal and understandable: only vigilance once allowed the leader to maintain his position in the pack, as well as the status of the sole ruler of all the fair sex in it. According to the habit inherent in the genes, men today act on the principle “it’s better to be overly safe than underdressed.”

We hasten to reassure representatives of the stronger half of humanity: suspicions regarding the betrayal of a beloved woman are unfounded in at least half of the cases, or even in two thirds. And yet, how do you know that a wife is cheating on her husband? Let's figure out in which cases your fears are most likely based on real grounds.

A woman gets more pleasure from cheating than a man: for him it’s not God knows what event, but for her cheating always means revenge, or passion, or sin.
Etienne Rey

How to tell if your wife is cheating

Of course, there is no way to make a mistake in this matter. Before making any accusations against your missus, you need to make sure that betrayal really took place.

Signs of possible betrayal:

Constant delays at work

If before the wife was always at home, for example, at 18.30, but lately she comes half an hour or an hour, or even two or three later, and at the same time constantly refers to various reasons such as a sudden inspection, an unscheduled report, a broken tram and an unexpectedly visiting friend, then it’s worth pricking up your ears.

It is best to find out about the real situation at work from one of your wife’s co-workers or even from her immediate supervisor.

Frequent absences from home

Your wife was an avid homebody, who you couldn’t even take to the store, and then suddenly she went to her mother, then to a neighbor, then to the market, then to a sale... In a word, she was never at home at all, but all under plausible pretexts.

It would be nice to check where she actually goes all the time.

Personal care

If previously a wife shaved her legs only before going to the seaside, but now she suddenly got an epilator and brings beauty almost every day, this is suspicious.

No less suspicious is the suddenly heightened attention to one’s intimate hygiene, the appearance of intimate haircuts, trips to beauty salons, solariums, massage rooms, constant “beauty masks” at night, and copious use of perfume.

Changes in appearance

A radical change of image is possible in only two cases - either when a woman understands that the time has come to change and does it for her own sake, or when she thus wants to attract or retain the attention of a partner.

If the image changes for the sake of the husband, then he will be the first to know about it - the wife will demand constant confirmation with words and glances of her irresistible beauty in the new image.

If a change in appearance (a new hairstyle, a change in hair color, a change in wardrobe, etc.) occurs without your participation in this and does not require any action from you, then this is a very suspicious symptom.

The emergence of new expensive things

This could be jewelry, dresses, watches, a phone, a handbag, cosmetics that your wife clearly cannot afford. Where did all this come from? With a high degree of probability we can assume that they were given by a lover.

Calls and SMS from unknown numbers

Moreover, they arrive in the evening, and the wife reads these messages with a suspiciously touching expression on her face or, covering the receiver with her hand, immediately runs out of the room. Short calls to which she gives monosyllabic answers are also suspicious.

Try to get her phone number and not only look at the history of calls and SMS (by the way, if the history is deleted, sound the alarm immediately), but also call the number from which all this excessive activity is coming.

Refusal of sex

Let's say your sex life wasn't great before. But if the wife began to refuse sex for various reasons and reduced her intimate life to one night a month, something is wrong.

If against this background you have not noticed a decline in her mood, the appearance of illnesses or a deterioration in her health, if the wife “blooms and smells”, then she still has a sex life. But not with you.

Changes in behavior

A woman's attitude towards her husband, whom she is cheating on, will certainly change. If she loves him and feels guilty before him, then she will become overly attentive, caring, helpful, and affectionate. If she didn’t love her husband before, then now she will become even ruder, harsher with him, perhaps she will even develop a disgust for him with further complete rejection. Even a not very attentive man will certainly notice this.

As can be seen from most of the examples above, the main thing that you should immediately pay attention to is sudden changes in behavior, work schedule and free time, attitude towards yourself and your appearance. It was always like this, but then one day it changed dramatically.
As Winnie the Pooh said in the famous cartoon, “this is for a reason”...

How to find out if your wife has a lover - proven methods

There are other ways to find out if your wife is cheating with certainty:

To start, look at her clothes. The smell of men's cologne, which clearly does not belong to her or you, a lock of someone else's hair, condoms kept in reserve in your pocket - these are no longer possible, but obvious signs of betrayal.
But if there is nothing like that, then it’s worth “fishing with live bait.” For this go on a fictional business trip(ask to stay with a friend for a couple of days) and keep your wife under surveillance. It is best that your “business trip” occurs on the weekend. A woman in love who has such a wonderful opportunity will either bring her lover home or will certainly meet him outside the house.
Of course, a wealthy husband can afford to hire a detective. We advise you to do so if you have such an opportunity.
Another option to bring your wife to clean water is install a hidden camera at home with sound and leave the house more often. While you are away, she will probably call her lover at least once, and maybe even bring him home.
Follow the reverse method - start spending all your free time with your wife. Shopping - together, in a cafe - together, visiting friends - together again, and even visiting your mother-in-law, too.
If the wife planned to spend her time in a completely different way, she will begin to get nervous and try to sneak away in any convenient way. If your suspicions were far-fetched, then such a pastime can benefit your marriage.
Talk to your wife. This banal method often turns out to be the most effective. Of course, it is unlikely that a wife of sound mind and sober memory will admit to cheating on you. Although anything can happen. But by her behavior and reaction to the question, you can guess whether you are on the right track.
Excessive emotionality when reacting to such a conversation and a reluctance to look you in the eyes can quite accurately indicate that adultery took place.

Loyalty comes much more difficult than innocence.
Marcel Achard

Video: How to find out if a girl/wife is cheating

Epilogue

So, we figured out how to find out that a wife has cheated on her husband. It remains to touch on one important nuance. A single betrayal and having a permanent lover are two different things.

In the first case, you are unlikely to ever find out the truth if your woman does not want it, or if, by coincidence, the truth does not come out.

If everything in your relationship is now even better than it was before, maybe you should forget about your suspicions and enjoy family life.

But it’s up to you to decide what to do with your regular lover. Typically men either:

they also have a mistress,
divorce his wife
leave everything as it is,
they bring their wife out into the open, but after that they save the marriage.

Only you can decide which path to choose.

Loving people, when getting married, hope that their relationship will forever remain honest, pure, and that there will not be a third wheel in it. Men, but often, tormented by doubts and suspicions, they do not know how to reliably find out, and at the same time not destroy the love union. In this article we will try to answer the following questions:

how to find out with 100% accuracy whether your wife is cheating?
What are the main signs of cheating?
What to do if cheating has already happened?

First of all, you need to figure out why doubts about your wife’s fidelity crept in right now. What prompted your suspicions? There are rare cases when a woman looks away if everything is in order in the family. And therefore, in order to understand whether there could be betrayal, it is necessary to look at the relationship detachedly and objectively.

Possible reasons

There may be a mass:

Indirect signs of betrayal

Men can be inattentive to the external changes of their halves, but by changes one can determine the betrayal of his wife. There are about 15 points.

The first sign: the wife has her head in the clouds. A thoughtful, dreamy look, a wandering smile, moist eyes. Sometimes he laughs, sometimes he cries, without explaining the reasons for the surging emotions.
The woman began to carefully monitor her appearance. New hairstyle, always wearing makeup, signed up for a fitness center, beautiful underwear.
Previously, my wife would throw the phone in a visible place without thinking, but now she won’t let it out of her hands., social network passwords have been changed, secrets have appeared - a serious reason to think about it. Now she doesn’t chat with her friend on the phone in front of you, but retreats to the bathroom and answers phone conversations in monosyllables. Even worse, the wife decided to sometimes stay overnight with a friend or sister. At the right moment, neither my friend nor my wife can be reached by phone, and only after some time does the wife call back from her mobile phone.
Darling began to stay late at work more often, meet friends outside the home, and began to have social hobbies, although my wife used to love spending time with her family. He reacts negatively to the offer to meet him from work.
Sexual behavior has changed. Having fallen in love with another man, a woman often tries to distance herself from marital obligations. There are a lot of reasons why sex will definitely happen tomorrow, but not now: the woman is tired, has a headache, is upset about something, etc. Sex itself is changing, a woman is not leading in bed as before.
Appeared criticality, irritability. The wife nags her husband over trifles, makes a bunch of complaints, does not thank him for the good, but notices the bad.
Indifference. A woman doesn’t care when a man returns home, his well-being, how things are going at work, she no longer cares whether a man pays attention to other women.
Admiration for others. A mysterious colleague, friend, friend’s husband appears in the conversation, who turns out to be smart, olfactory, and hardworking. At the same time, the wife clarifies every time that she has only friendly, friendly relations with this man and she is not attracted to him as a man. This does not mean that the wife is already cheating, but you should still be wary.

Physiology

There are not enough indirect signs to accuse a wife of cheating. Therefore, you need to pay attention to physiological signs. So, how can you tell by looking at your body whether there has been cheating?

The girl was once again late at work. When your wife comes home, look at her appearance: disheveled hair, tights with arrows, rumpled clothes, swollen lips - signs of betrayal.
Worth a look on the face. Women experience irritation after touching male stubble. If there were kisses with another man, then it will be noticeable.
In close contact with a lover the woman takes in his scents. Men's eau de toilette, body odor, if they are strangers, are noticeable. If there was sex, then the woman has a specific smell: this is the smell of lubricant and sperm. But even if the wife doesn’t smell like anything, as if she just got out of the shower, it’s strange. How to check without giving away unusual interest? Meet your wife at the door, hug, kiss, inhale the aroma of skin, hair, body.
If the wife came home and went to the shower, offer your help: rub your back. After sex, there will be redness and bites on the body, especially in the chest, thighs, and arms.

Evidence of betrayal

But there are ways that allow you to be sure of a girl’s infidelity with 100% accuracy. How to make sure your wife is cheating?

Can you tell cheating by looking at your underpants? Yes. There is a special set of infidelity: within 72 hours after a possible betrayal, you need to take your wife’s underwear and take it to the laboratory.

Fact: after sex, a woman’s genitals secrete fluid containing elements of sperm for another three days.

Treason proven

Before convicting your wife of cheating, you should talk frankly with yourself: are you ready to separate, are you ready for... Isn’t it your fault that your wife has lost interest in you and started looking elsewhere? Do you love her even after the betrayal or now you can’t live with her under the same roof? How serious was her affair? How to understand the wife's action? What to do now?

First, sit down and talk. Find out how important these relationships outside the family are for her. Then it all depends on how you feel: if pain and resentment overpower your former feelings for your loved one, then you need to separate. Because constant reproaches will still not allow you to return sincere love relationships.

It may turn out that the wife herself wants to go to her lover. And you also need to be prepared for this. For some, this blow may be worse than betrayal. But if you decide to stay together and continue to build family relationships, you will have to make serious efforts to restore trust and understanding. You may need the help of a psychologist. But in any case, a lot will have to change in marriage. This is a difficult, traumatic situation for everyone. The choice is yours.

Video consultation

Ten signs from Alexander Samsonov.